Desperate Housewives

BY: GURU JAY

Telenovela starring Eva Longoria is a funny Latino TV show. NBC desperately needs the Desperate Housewife to perform in its lineup. Let’s give Longoria some time to develop her character before writing off the new series.

One thing is for sure; Eva is one of the hottest 40 years olds in TV history. She’s slowly cashing in on her brand power. Moreover, her star power is already extraordinary.

Even if Telenovela is cancelled, Eva will keep going and going like the Energizer Bunny. In other words, the actress is well equipped with battery power as well.

She belongs barefooted on the beach in a bikini. The Paparazzi pounces on the chance to snap photos of a half-naked Eva Longoria. I won’t say her body is perfect but I will say her body has minimal imperfections.

Curves come in handy when the director yells cut and action. Did you know Eva Longoria is a director and producer too? If you want the biggest payday, consider directing and producing. An average director pulls in more bucks than the highest paid actor.

Because the senorita’s an executive producer of Devious Maids, she can kick her feet up and light a cigar- or bong depending on the mood. The celebrity can make demands because she’s a mover and shaker. Moreover, Eva has perfected her rhythm.

It seems meeting the Dalai Lama had a profound effect on the star. She’s in tuned with her chakras.

Photos By: Wikimedia Commons

Plus, Eva Longoria is part of the 19 Best Black and Latina Actresses. People underestimate her dramatic skills because they typecast her. While Eva’s great in the comedy genre, she isn’t one-dimensional.

After watching Harsh Times, you’ll see a different side. Also, you’ll like Christian Bale and Michael Pena (who plays Eva’s husband). How does the Latin actress please everybody?

Who doesn’t want to Salsa dance with Longoria? Longoria mixes it up without missing a beat.

TV is an unsafe place considering all the violent depictions. We can do without bloody murder on our living room screens. The world needs more sitcoms and less criminal thrillers. That’s why TV is a better place everytime Telenovela airs. Let’s thank Eva Longoria for portraying positive imagery.

I am Guru Jay launching into orbit in 5-4-3-2-1!

BY: GURU JAY

Warning

How dirty is Hollywood’s politics? How shady is Hollywood’s business? Are you sure you want to work in this entertainment industry?

Sofía Vergara is a bigger brand but Eva Longoria is a brighter star. There is a clear distinction between brand and star power. The brand will last long after the star has burnt out.

Did you know Vergara gets paid to drink Diet Pepsi? Also, Sofía stars in Rooms to Go commercials. Plus, she is a Cover Girl.

Marilyn Monroe, Elvis Pressley, and Bob Marley died but their image and likeness lives on through merchandising. I respect Sofía Vergara’s brand and marketing. Sources say Vergara has a net worth of $85 million and counting. In comparison, estimates put Eva Longoria’s value at $35 million.

I wonder sometimes whether Longoria realizes her star power, because she’s seriously underutilizing her famous name. Nonetheless, I applaud the celebrity’s charitable activities. What is more, I believe her philanthropy is making a difference.

By no means is Eva the perfect role model. However, she gladly confronts challenging issues. Plus, Eva seems humble.

I like Sofía but she appears overconfident. Nobody is above the law of Father Time. At some point beauty fades fast. I’m not saying Vergara can’t act, but Longoria is better.

Doesn’t Sofía deserve recognition for Modern Family? The Colombian-American plays her part terrifically. Latinos should embrace Vergara with open arms. It’s amazing the highest paid TV star is Latina.

I consider Longoria and Vergara the TV version of Cameron Diaz and Jessica Alba. Like Diaz and Alba, they are both dazzling and in high demand. So, why aren’t Eva and Sofía in more movies?

Photos By: Wikimedia Commons

I’ve heard Hot Pursuit starring Reese Witherspoon and Sofía Vergara is giggle-filled. Furthermore, Frontera is some of Eva Longoria’s best work. Do you see why Sofía and Eva are the best Latina actresses?

I am Guru Jay launching off into orbit in 5-4-3-2-1!