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How Eva Longoria Makes TV Better

BY: GURU JAY
Telenovela starring Eva Longoria is a funny Latino TV show. NBC desperately needs the Desperate Housewife to perform in its lineup. Let’s give Longoria some time to develop her character before writing off the new series.
One thing is for sure; Eva is one of the hottest 40 years olds in TV history. She’s slowly cashing in on her brand power. Moreover, her star power is already extraordinary.
Even if Telenovela is cancelled, Eva will keep going and going like the Energizer Bunny. In other words, the actress is well equipped with battery power as well.

She belongs barefooted on the beach in a bikini. The Paparazzi pounces on the chance to snap photos of a half-naked Eva Longoria. I won’t say her body is perfect but I will say her body has minimal imperfections.
Curves come in handy when the director yells cut and action. Did you know Eva Longoria is a director and producer too? If you want the biggest payday, consider directing and producing. An average director pulls in more bucks than the highest paid actor.
Because the senorita’s an executive producer of Devious Maids, she can kick her feet up and light a cigar- or bong depending on the mood. The celebrity can make demands because she’s a mover and shaker. Moreover, Eva has perfected her rhythm.
It seems meeting the Dalai Lama had a profound effect on the star. She’s in tuned with her chakras.

 Photos By: Wikimedia Commons

Plus, Eva Longoria is part of the 19 Best Black and Latina Actresses. People underestimate her dramatic skills because they typecast her. While Eva’s great in the comedy genre, she isn’t one-dimensional.
After watching Harsh Times, you’ll see a different side. Also, you’ll like Christian Bale and Michael Pena (who plays Eva’s husband). How does the Latin actress please everybody?
Who doesn’t want to Salsa dance with Longoria? Longoria mixes it up without missing a beat.
TV is an unsafe place considering all the violent depictions. We can do without bloody murder on our living room screens. The world needs more sitcoms and less criminal thrillers. That’s why TV is a better place everytime Telenovela airs. Let’s thank Eva Longoria for portraying positive imagery.

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Tina Fey: Full Throttle

BY: GURU JAY

Tina Fey and Amy Poehler cohosted Saturday Night Live recently. Two hosts for one show is a rarity for SNL. When Tina and Amy combine their talents it’s a wonderful sight. We’re walking in a Winter Wonderland!
I am a comedy connoisseur. I indulge only in the finest. I can attest to Tina Fey’s richness.
Funny girl Tina Fey performs at full throttle. Like a Charlie Angel, she is hot and well equipped. Expect the purest quality from Fey.
She should get a show similar to John Oliver and Bill Maher. I thoroughly enjoyed Tina Fey’s Weekend Update. That’s when Fey and Poehler first formed a bond.


Can you imagine Tina replacing Ellen DeGeneres on daytime TV? Did you know Upper Darby is her hometown? That’s close to West Philadelphia, where Will Smith was born and raised.
Don’t you love her satire? Styles win over smiles in showbiz. By working smart Tina Fey built a geeky brand.
The brunette comedian complements comedy variety shows and sitcoms. She was the reason 30 Rock became such a huge success. Additionally Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt, created by Tina Fey and Robert Carlock, is beloved by Netflix “chillers.”

 
Her subtle humor is indirectly infectious. She plays a perfect Sarah Palin. “You betcha.”
Moreover, Tina keeps making funny movies. The Sisters movie receives high marks. The wife and mother of two children starred in Baby Mama alongside Amy Poehler in 2008.
If you’re considering dinner and a movie, I highly recommend Date Night. Steve Carell couples with Tina Fey and they put on terrific performances. Mark Wahlberg makes a memorable appearance flexing his muscles and cracking computer codes.

 Photos By: Wikimedia Commons

Laughter is the best medicine. And Tina Fey is the head nurse of comedy. Although doctors take all the credit, everybody knows nurses save the day.
Right now I believe this comedic actress is at her absolute best for she’s a jolly good fellow, which nobody can deny! The celebrity could reasonably rest on her laurels. However, she chooses to continue blessing the masses with her work. You must admire her career achievements.
I appreciate her dedication, consistency, and maintenance. She is built Ford tough. What is better than watching Tina Fey accelerate at full throttle?

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Having Fun with Jenny McCarthy

BY: GURU JAY

Let’s have some fun with comedienne and model Jenny McCarthy as we wrap up this old year and welcome a new one. Get ready for confetti and surprises during Dick Clark’s New Year’s Rockin’ Evecohosted by Jenny with Ryan Seacrest. Bet big on the Playboy bunny because she’s a favorite.
The View should have kept McCarthy under contract. My theory is that they were jealous of her sex appeal. They couldn’t stand how much attention the hot blonde celebrity was receiving. On a side note, I’m happy Candace Cameron Bure got a chance.
Let’s get back to business. When Jenny McCarthy looks at her reflection, the mirror blushes. Plus, the bubbly personality is funny.
I like Jenny McCarthy better than Chelsea Handler. Instead of being rivals, Jenny and Chelsea are good friends. Though deep down inside, I believe they feel the urge to be dirtier, sexier, and funnier than one another. After all, they’re trying to reach the same demographics.

Every comedienne desperately wants to become the modern Carol Burnett except for Jenny McCarthy. Maybe, Amy Schumer could do it. Kathy Griffin tried hard to become Carol but failed. Hence, she’s still on the D-list.

Anyway, the Dirty Love actress always holds down a job in Hollywood because she loves doing dirty jobs. She is the blonde maid of comedy. Jenny McCarthy epitomizes toilet humor.
A woman’s wit is underappreciated, while her appearance is overvalued by society. Attractiveness is only one part of the equation in productive relationships. Jenny paid for her Tinseltown ticket not by good looks but via her talent agent.
What is more, she is a multi-talented entertainer. Remember she became famous before reality TV produced an alternative route. Ironically, McCarthy has a recurring role on the Wahlburgers reality show right now.


Some people belong in show business. Jenny McCarthy offers a great deal to the entertainment industry. Through TV, movies, and satellite radio Jenny tells a variety of entertaining stories.
Nothing beats Jenny. And she never gets old. In the future, I imagine she’ll have her own talk show rivaling Wendy Williams. Somebody must dethrone Wendy! Why not Jenny?
Picture the photogenic celeb everyday on network television. I will be the program’s creator and executive producer. I already have the TV show’s name. I call it Having Fun with Jenny McCarthy. I’ll have my people call her people, and Viacom’s people.

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How Kelly Ripa Became a Household Name

BY: GURU JAY

Wife and mother Kelly Ripa became a household name the old fashioned way. From 1990 to 2002, millions welcomed the blonde daughter on All My Children into their living rooms everyday. Next the playful Pipa played Regis Philbin’s sidekick on live television for a decade.
Today, she is the primary player on the Live with Kelly and Michael team. She shows there is nothing wrong with waiting your turn and playing your role in the meantime. The members know Kelly Ripa paid her dues and that’s why the celebrity receives preferential treatment. She belongs to an exclusive club.
Not many Hollywood hotshots have clocked as many hours as Kelly. What is more, you can count on her delivering the goods. She isn’t shy when it comes to highlighting her attributes.
Every boss would like his employees to have Kelly’s credentials. Pipa does all the little things right. Plus she gets the big ones done properly.
Right now, Kelly Ripa is close to becoming a legend. Her successor will have some big shoes to fill. And no, I’m not talking about Michael Strahan’s ‘Giants’ shoe size.

 Photos By: Wikimedia Commons
Jokes aside, Ripa is a very influential woman, especially in entertainment and media. She reached her status by obeying the laws of attraction and self-preservation.

Kelly Ripa is literally a household name because she submitted to both conservative and liberal ideas. On the one hand, Kelly stays in her place. On the other hand, the fun babe is all over the place.
I hope Kelly keeps it up for at least 5 more years. I could use Pipa’s perky spirit as I grow my website. Like a San Francisco 49ers cheerleader- Kelly is a treat. She brightens up countless days with her sweet smile and kind eyes.
I greatly admire Kelly Ripa’s consistency. Despite negative circumstances, she remains positive throughout her journey. I look forward to reading Ripa’s next chapters.

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What’s Your Taste? Rachael Ray Vs. The Chew

BY: GURU JAY

  
What’s your taste of cooking TV talk show? Do you prefer only one host to a panel of cohosts? Let’s discuss Rachael RayVs. The Chew.
The Rachael Ray Show has filmed 1,500 episodes since 2007. The Chew Show has filmed 852 episodes since 2011. These shows compete for the same coveted demographics.
I watch both shows sometimes, especially when I want to surprise a special lady with dinner and a movie. I guess I’m used to Rachael Ray. She seems to be the heir-apparent to Martha Stewart.
It’s all about personality. I like Rachael’s bubbliness and sweetness. And Mario Batali is fun.

However, it is Carla Hall who I would like most to cook my meal. She was born and raised in the American South, so you know what that means. Look at the joy she’s serving. Are your taste buds watering now?
I like the others as well. 29 year-old Daphne Oz helps attract the younger crowd.
You see television can serve as a launching pad for a celebrity’s brand. For example, Rachael Ray has her very own magazine called Everyday with Rachael Ray. Plus, the upbeat chef has a reality TV show on the Food Network- Rachael Vs. Guy: Celebrity Cook-off.
                                                             
I doubt that the 47 year-old will be retiring any time soon because she works more jobs than Ryan Seacrest. I prefer the Rachael Ray Show because of the celeb’s branding. The Chew is on the right track, but the show has a long way before catching up with Ray.

Although I prefer a panel because of the variety of perspectives and opinions, Rachael is a gift. She’s the closest thing to Julia Child. Don’t you love Rachael Ray’s recipes?
It is a matter of preferences. Both talk shows are entertaining. But, Rachael Ray is better.

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AMAs Recap

BY: GURU JAY


It was a spectacular celebration at the AMAs last night. Jennifer Lopez started singing her hit song Waiting for Tonight. Then, out of nowhere she broke into dancing to this year’s most popular music. She had help from dozens of dancers.
Trivia: AMAs stands for American Music Awards
There were too many shows to mention them all. Hopefully, I highlight the best ones. At Guru Jay, I provide the best entertainment.

The Weeknd won the first award, presented by Prince. Later in the show, the Hills singer performed his classic. He literally set the stage on fire. I was worried he might burn to a crisp and they would have to evacuate the building.

All the stars came out for the night. Everything you could want to happen happened. There was tongue kissing, confetti falling, and nudity.
Gwen Stefani arrived on the red carpet wearing a naked dress. Right now her dress is a major trend on social media. While singing Used to Love You, Gwen had the crowd shedding tears.

Also, Nick Jonas gave a nice performance. He had a lively choir back him up on Jealous. I keep saying he is the future Justin Timberlake.
Additionally, rivals Demi Lovato and Selena Gomez delivered exciting routines. Plus, Coldplay put on a colorful show featuring dancers in gorilla-suits.
One Direction took home Artist of the Year again. I thought Taylor Swift deserve it for her 1989 album. This is what I call “music politics.”

 Photos By: Wikimedia Commons

The media hyped Taylor Swift all year. Radio constantly blasted Shake It Off, Bad Blood, and Blank Space. I’m not the biggest “Swifty,” but I give credit where it is due. Taylor got robbed.
Finally, Justin Bieber closed the AMAs like only he could do. The Biebs performed What Do You Mean, Where Are U Now, and Sorry. Did you get a glimpse of the AMAs?
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Are You Watching Jessica Jones?

BY: GURU JAY

Are you watching Jessica Jones? I have watched the first three episodes. I decided to write a recap because it’s a dynamic viewing experience.

Disclaimer: even the most expensive diamonds contain flaws though. So, I’ll point out what I don’t like about Jessica Jones first.
To begin with, the storyline makes too many assumptions. If you’re unfamiliar with the comic book, you’ll have a hard time figuring out what’s happening.
Also, I didn’t like how the camera zooms and angles. Why is it necessary to show human bodies at a distance? For instance, when Jessica’s snapping pictures the people are too far away for you to appreciate their gestures and mannerisms. If I were an actor in the series, I would want my full face and body shown and you would too.
I believe the screenwriters are drunk with power. The barrier to entry for screenwriting restricts fantastic writers. Overall, I give the writing a C-, and the acting receives an A-.
I’m upset because although the series is good, it could be better.
Marvel’s Jessica Jones on Netflix may lack in some areas, but I still recommend watching it. I see a promising future for the series. Jessica Jones, Luke Cage, and Trish Walker were excellently casted. Krysten Ritter, Mike Colter, and Rachael Taylor are a good fit.

 Photos By: Wikimedia Commons

Furthermore, the plot and characters are intriguing. Watching Jessica Jones is a reliever from a difficult day. Finally, you see things from a different perspective with a unique feel.
Can you picture a world with the same set of lenses? In Marvel’s universe, there are superheroes. Superhero Jessica Jones is one in a million.
Unfortunately, there are villains too. The antihero Kilgrave can control people’s minds, including Jessica’s head. What’s amazing is Kilgrave can do this telepathically. In the first episode, Hope Shlottman shoots and kills her parents in point blank range while under Kilgrave’s remote control.
Apparently, Jessie’s best friend/ talk show host Trish Walker has history with Kilgrave as well. But, Trish foolishly exposes his existence to her audience.
Kilgrave sends a Boy in Blue out to murder the babe. Luckily, she survives police brutality. In the nick of time, Jessica injects Trish with sleep antihesia. You see, the superhero discovers that’s Kilgrave’s weakness is sleep anesthesia after talking to Dr. Karuta. What is your weakness?

 
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