Category: Real Housewives

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Who Are Your Favorite Real Housewives?

BY: GURU JAY

Do you want to blowup overnight? Is it your time to shine and be famous? Would you like to have your own reality TV show? 

Can you picture the camera crew literally waiting all day for you to BLOW UP? You see blowing up can take on multiple meanings. Anyway, let’s put more meaning behind our words; and at the same time don’t take someone’s bullshit too literal. 

You don’t have to watch a reality show to know we don’t live in a drama free world. But, there’s hope thanks to Hollywood. Instead of concentrating on all the violence, you can choose to focus on Exhibit A: Kim Kardashian or Exhibit B. Kylie Jenner. 

In the words of the Beatles, give peace a DAMN chance! You see that I put a twist on it. The fact is reality TV allows an escape from the real world.

Are you a single mother? It’s hard paying rent sometimes. It’s a struggle but be “thankful for what you got and keep on pushing.” Curtis Mayfield told us that.

Are you a housewife? You can just relax and be yourself. Feed the kids. Get them off to school. 

Then, go shopping. Get a manicure and pedicure. Cook dinner. Clean house. 

Photos By: Wikimedia Commons

Now, it’s time to party. So, Sh-shake your money maker. The only caveat is it is all on tape for everyone to see. But you get a fat check at the end of the day. 

Here’s an idea. Why not make a private reality show right now? Call it Me-Time.

Do you watch the Real Housewives? Who are your favorite stars? What franchises do you like better? My two favorites are Bethenny Frankel and NeNe Leakes. I like New Jersey (RHONJ) and Atlanta (RHOA) and Beverly Hills (RHOBH) more than the rest.

If you asked me, I had enough of Wendy Williams. Bring back the Bethenny talk show. I think they didn’t want to pay full value for Bethenny and settled for Wendy. Chime in your comments.

I am Guru Jay launching into orbit in 5-4-3-2-1!
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Astronaut Wives Club Pilot Episode RECAP

BY: GURU JAY
You know I was an aspiring astronaut. That’s why my Google Plus and Twitter, shows the universe. You see, I fantasized about launching and orbiting deep into space.
I had it all figured out. I would conveniently bypass the moon on my way to Mars and Jupiter. Upon my arrivals, I would settle colonies with Elon Musk and Richard Branson, and vacation on Venus.
Back to story-> I still dream. But, I decided to become a guru instead of Stephen Hawking, III. And, I’m happy with my life choices.
Yesterday, I stumbled upon the Astronaut Wives Clubpilot episode. While browsing TV, I changed the channel to ABC, and discovered the new program just starting. Naturally, the premiere gained my attention.

The TV show is a mixture of Mad Men and Real Housewives. The story takes place in the 1960s. And, the premise is that a Life Magazine reporter reluctantly writes down the experiences of astronaut wives.
What an exclusive club to be in, especially around that time.

Moreover, Astronaut Wives uses real names and images of actual people like John Glenn and Alan Shepard. However, this time it’s not about the men leaping small steps. This time, it’s about the women telling their sides of the story.
Plus, you see how far technology has advanced. After seeing this, you appreciate your ability to communicate swiftly. Back then you couldn’t text, let alone talk on smartphones.
What is more, these redheads possess a protestant’s work ethic. They dutifully care for their husbands and families. Although they don’t despise their roles and positions, they desire R-E-S-P-E-C-T from their husbands.
In a pivotal scene, Trudy Cooper formulates a plot to catch her cheating husband. You see he lied to her one too many times. She is four five seconds from wilding in the 60s. 

 Photos By: Wikimedia Commons

Most likely, I will watch Astronaut Wives again. What about you? Are you joining the club?
I am Guru Jay launching off into orbit in 5-4-3-2-1! 
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How Jennifer Lopez Built the JLo Brand

BY: GURU JAY

Nowadays, anybody can be famous. Buy a digital camera or use your fancy iPhone to record your intriguing or foolish lifestyle. Look no further than the Real Housewives as a prime example.

Long before reality TV, Jennifer Lopez was real. In fact, JLo lived by that motto coining a song I’m Real. Respect Jennifer Lopez because she’s truly talented. 

ROCK THAT BODY

In the process of building her brand, the entertainer reportedly insured her ass for $27 million. With the invention of Nicki Minaj now the price of booty has doubled. In this superficial industry, JLo’s body rocks like a Black Eyed Peas song.

The super fly lady’s body is out of sight. She works hard to stay in shape. Give credit where it is due. Who represents Puerto Rico and the Bronx better than Jenny from the block?

BRAND NAME

Photos By: Wikimedia Commons

Like Pepsi and Blue Magic, JLo is a brand name. Why hasn’t American Gangster Denzel Washington made a movie with Jennifer? Hollywood has dropped the ball.

Jennifer Lopez constantly complains about choosing the wrong partner. Frankly, the triple threat celebrity intimidates boyfriends. You see we still live in a world where men are expected to provide for their families.

Puff Daddy (Diddy) and JLo were perfect for each other. Although her love didn’t cost a thing, Lopez needed a bossy man. Jay Z might listen to Beyoncé but in the end he calls all the shots.

JLo shines brightly because like a distant star she’s been here awhile. Without Lopez, Selena Gomez and Demi Lovato would not be multimillionaires. People pay attention to Jennifer, because she’s an exceptional entertainer who crossed boundaries.

Music lovers and movie buffs can’t get enough of Jennifer Lopez. Who makes better dance music and romantic flicks than the booty pioneer? Good music makes girls twerk their butts. In a recent blog post, I proposed that Jennifer Lopez and Shakira make a single. I want to see JLo and Mariah Carey too.

 I am Guru Jay launching off into orbit in 5-4-3-2-1!